A lot of people lately have been asking me about marriage. What’s it like? Why did we get married so young? Aren’t you scared to be stuck with one person forever? How is it different than just living together?
It’s different legally. We share bank accounts & names. I did some soul searching & decided to change my name to his. We pay taxes together. If I’m dying in the hospital, he has the right to take care of me. And he knows how things are supposed to go when I’m dead.
It’s different emotionally. And that I can’t explain. It just is. And I love it. It’s like living with your best friend, because even when you dance to the same Robyn song for an hour, they will start dancing along with you & ask if you want a second beer with dinner. It’s like living with a first grader, because they leave their socks all over hell & never remember where the spatulas go. Or they decide we have too many cutting boards (impossible) & decide to hide them from you–in the storage closet, in the dry sink, in a suitcase. BUT YOU ALWAYS FIND THEM.
It’s different socially. Which is weird. People treat us differently because we were married young. They assume that we’re conservative Christians. Or that we already have kids. Or that we’re weird as shit for not wanting to sleep around longer. I’m not joking. These are all things people have said to me.
Other people are just confused. But you seem like a feminist. Why would you get married & take his name now? PATRIARCHY! I got married because it was right for us. Because we love not being settled down in the scary way people use that term, but we love being not settled down together. We love figuring it all out, even when it’s scary & you don’t know where your June paycheck will come from.
There’s also this interesting article which rings true in our case: happier, but more broke than people that get married later. Suck on THAT.
In anticipation for the new season of Mad Men, I spent way too much time clicking through this gif-filled post. I stole some gifs that seemed to summarize what I love about marriage.
It’s dancing like this…
But it’s mostly a lot of this. In public. At home. At the store.
Happy Mad Men Premiere Day!